Every now and again I take an accidental break from blogging. These breaks are getting a bit more frequent as I struggle to find the time to sit down and write these days. Actually, I struggle to find time to even think about what I want to write, let alone get the words out.
Before Christmas, I was rushed off my feet trying to get presents bought and wrapped (which always takes way longer than you expect), we had a few family birthdays, and work was hectic. There was no time at all to blog, and the longer I left it the harder it became to start writing again. I’ve gone a month without posting now, and when it gets to that point it feels like make or break time.
I don’t blog as my career, so I should’t feel like it matters if I take a break, but it is actually a competitive old world. We’ve had some nice opportunities through my blog, which have come at times when I’ve put a lot of effort into it and built up my stats, so it’s disheartening to see page views drop and my position tumble in blog charts (yes, blog charts are an actual thing!).
I took the three days between Christmas and new year off from work so I could have a bit longer with Stew and the boys, and I had some leave left so could do it without impacting on any time off in 2018. As I abandoned the blog through most of December I thought I could use those days to stockpile some photos ready, draft some posts, and maybe even come up with a plan for things to cover this year.
Did it happen? No, of course not. Do you know what? I hardly even thought about the blog at all. I took some days off social media, I took hardly any photos (apart from Christmas Day so we can look back at them), and I completely relaxed. We spent days playing with new toys, watching films and just enjoying being at home with each other. It rained for most of the week, and I didn’t even worry that we couldn’t go anywhere to blog about it.
I realised half way through the week that I hadn’t had that much time off without going on holiday since my maternity leave ended in December 2016. Travel is a huge passion of mine, but it can be exhausting with two young children. When we came home from Amsterdam I felt like I needed another week off to recover!
Last week there was no pressure to get out and do something every day. We didn’t feel like we’d be missing out by staying in our pyjamas all day watching Go Jetters and decorating gingerbread men. There was no rush in the morning to get everyone ready for school, nursery and work. No pleading with the boys to eat up and get dressed, no texts to say I’ll be late home from work so eat without me. Just quality family time.
I actually felt like a good mother for the first time in months. And all it took was a week off with no plans. Maybe the festive spirit helped – I don’t know – but the boys really seemed to appreciate that I was home over the holidays (for the first week, at least), and not distracted from them.
I did wonder then if it was time to give up on the blog once and for all, but when I thought about it I wasn’t ready to let it go. It’s my only hobby, and a way of combining my loves of writing, photography and travel. I’m still not entirely sure where it’ll take me, but there might be a change of direction over the next few months.
First of all, I’m not going to beat myself up about not writing as regularly as I’d like. I’m trying to work full time and raise two little ones,- and quite often on little sleep. If that means I can’t post for a week, then that’s fine. As I said, I’m not relying on it for my income, so why should I worry so much?
Secondly, my focus might well change from the boys and more onto my interests (not that I’m not interested in them, of course!). I hope to write a bit more about fashion, lifestyle and our home – the things I enjoy reading on other blogs. Partly because as the boys they get older, they might not appreciate the amount I’m sharing about their lives, and that’s their decision. That’s not to say they won’t feature at all – the whole reason I started this blog was so I could look back on our parenting journey – but there might be a bit more of me and a bit less of them for a change. Hopefully there will still be a fair bit of travel and days out if we manage some trips this year, as I often get comments from people saying they enjoy reading about where we’ve been.
So that’s where I’ve been, and where I’m heading. Sorry for the rambling post – I’ve been trying to get these thoughts straight in my head for a little while, and it always helps to write things down! If there’s anything you’d like to read about, just let me know and I’ll see what I can do!